How yoga teacher training helped me heal and find courage

All my life, from a very young age, I’ve been struggling with anxiety.

Later on, with a combination of a difficult childhood and surely a genetic predisposition, I got diagnosed with depression. I was only 15 years old. Then, until today, from time to time, I would fall into that state of being. I called it a state of being, because I would feel it in all my body, and it would even take control of my mind, loosing the ability to think clearly, and to make mundane decisions.

Somehow, it’s like if I get paralyzed, frozen, that the world around me would keep running, but that I am not part of it. It has become a part of me for so long, I often think everyone around me feels exactly like this too, and process their emotions and thoughts the same way I do. When something defines our reality, we tend to normalize it, to forget that it can be any different.

In August 2018, I came back from a year of travelling where I found home in Nicaragua for about 6 months. Over there, I really cut loose and became bitter about our fast pace daily life, our individualism and realized how we live in abundance of material and even relationships we don’t need, how we always crave for more and get tired of all so quickly. When I came back in Canada, nothing would make sense to me.

I felt in huge discordance with every single thing that was around me, finding non sense in my habits and desires and those from the people I love. I tried to close my eyes and I told my self I would make as much money as possible, and start to study again in May 2019, I would try to make a life here.

But you know how things happen – you plan something and life often has its own plans for you. So, in a matter of 2-3 weeks, I got into the worst depression and anxiety I’ve ever had. It was bad. I would spend full days locked up in my bedroom, leaving the light off and the curtain closed, lost a lot of weight. I don’t need to go further in details, but it was not good, I didn’t know it could possibly get to this point.

One morning, I needed a change, a shift. I decided to go to my first Yoga class.

A moderately intense hot yoga class. I think I didn’t only sweat off tons of water, but huge amount of stress, too. I remember the feeling of real peace during the Savasana. It was literally if  finally, I could breath again.

So what happens next, I was in a yoga class about 5 or 6 days out of 7. I made it a religion. I picked up quite quickly as I did a lot of gymnastics during my childhood and teenage years, flexibility somehow got memorized in my cells. Some teachers would come to see me after the class and asked me if I’ve been doing yoga for a long time because I seemed to have a really good comprehension of my body. It felt super great and was confidence boosting.

I was only 2 months into yoga. I started to feel better, a considerable improvement I would say. But, after a while, it became like a routine. I came to a point where I felt my learning was stuck because the teaching would always stay to the same level. I felt I needed more, and I didn’t have enough knowledge to start my own practice. I went less and less often, and the depression took more power over me again .

It was freezing outside and it was hard to pack up my bag, get into my car and drive 30 minutes to go to the yoga studio. One day, I started to search online for a Yoga Teacher Training. It’s like as if I didn’t need to ask any other questions to myself. I just felt it was the right thing to do. And I looked for a school, hours and hours, days and days because I was obsessed with finding a place that would fill all my demands. Then, I remember I found this one school, Gyan Yog Breath, in Rishikesh, the capital city of yoga, in India. That was it, I was sure. It was back in November, and…

I booked a place to start my Yoga Teacher Training on February 1st.

April 2nd, 2019

I am back home since a week now. And yes, from travelling in nearly 20 countries since the last 4 years, I have finally found something I was kinda looking for, there, during my yoga teacher training in India. I don’t think I would be able to put the right words on it, because it is subtle and a very internal process, but it’s there.

I think we could call it a sense of clarity. A sense of clarity about who I am, about my identity. I’ve been roaming around in life, trying to figure out my role and trying to fulfill my family’s wishes about me, trying to follow this normal path defined by the society. But right now, this feeling of resistance inside of me completely vanished.

For the first time, I know I don’t need to prove myself, I know I don’t need to fight back to be considered and accepted. I am, simply, and whatever I am, I am enough. I have let down the anxiety about what important things I should accomplish in this world, and how I should earn money.

I feel like there will be a way for me and I am filled with confidence.

This is what yoga taught me during this month, let all go, let all come. If you are on the path of yoga, you already know that this journey is so much more than performing asanas on your mat. Asanas are just the tip of the iceberg. The magic behind is the big thing.

Being in a group of unique humans, all into self-discovery and personal growth adventure, receiving so much knowledge about yoga, practicing asanas during several hours per day, exploring the power of breathing techniques and meditation, having to wake-up super early and fight against the laziness, working on your responsibility and commitment, being in this incredible spiritual city of Rishikesh, eating delicious nutritious food for your body, and so on, it all built this bubble of strength, positivity and guidance around me.

Yes, life might be unexpected, and I unexpectedly found myself doing a Yoga Teacher Training in February, and there, I have found courage. I’m ready and excited for what’s next.

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Naturally born writer, chai lover, professional daydreamer, aspiring photographer and passionate handbalancer, Florence is an artist at soul who recently completed her 200HR Yoga Teacher Training with Gyan Yog Breath in India. There, she found something she has been looking for during the last 4 years of travelling around the world. A sense of clarity that will guide her into her new journey in India.

 

 

merry Christmas self care and love

Self-care and compassion over Christmas

We send and give Christmas cards to people that we know, care about and love.

On this day, I encourage you to address one to yourself, too.  What would your wishes be? Good health, love, success, prosperity? Pick a card or make it yourself, grab a pen and express your dearest wishes to you from you! Continue reading

how massage can help improve physical and mental health

How Massage Can Improve Your Physical And Mental Health

Are you planning to incorporate massage therapy into your health care program? Or perhaps a joint pain or a headache is making your life difficult, and you are searching for a way to minimize this? If you are also trying to boost your mental health by reducing stress and anxiety which can lead to depression, then massage therapy might be the answer you are looking for. There are different types of massage therapy, but it is agreed that choosing the best type of massage technique can be a pretty challenging task. Consequently, you have to make some considerations before commencing on choosing the best therapy. When selecting a massage therapy consider consulting you physician to avoid counterproductive results.

In this article, we will lead you through three different but proven massage techniques that you might find useful in your healing process.

Continue reading

The Power of Power Posing

The benefits of power poses and their effects on our physical and psychological health

Body language plays an important role in determining our state of mind as well as our overall sense of well-being. Research has shown that it can influence the levels of the hormones testosterone and cortisol, which have been shown to impact our ability to deal with stress.

Continue reading

reasons a yoga retreat will change your life

4 Reasons a Retreat will change your life

It’s so easy to find yourself overwhelmed by the daily worries and stress of the fast-paced modern world. Never-ending ‘to-do list’ weigh us down with the seemingly impossible to complete tasks that are continuously updated and extended by mobile devices that ensure we are contactable around the clock. Sometimes it can feel as though there is nowhere to hide.

As we try our best to keep on top of the errands and chores of daily life we rarely give ourselves time to take a breath before one day rolls into the next and we start again. Today our bodies and minds are never given enough time to rest and recharge. A retreat can be the perfect solution to replenish your health and boost body and mind to a peak level of wellness.

Although perhaps only a temporary escape, in essence, finding absolute seclusion, at any one of the retreats now available all over the world in some of the most beautiful locations on the planet, can yield benefits that may change your life for the better, enabling you to live a healthier and more balanced life upon your return home. 

I stand testament to this having nearly run myself into an early grave during a highly stressful, yet successful 10-year career in sales and marketing. Today things look a lot different; after experiencing my first retreat on the advice of a colleague, I began studying in my own time and after becoming professionally qualified took the leap in starting my own health and wellness business and am now proud to offer health retreats in Bali, Indonesia.

HERE ARE 4 REASONS I BELIEVE A RETREAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOR THE BETTER:

  • REFLECTION

4 reasons a yoga retreat will change your life

In a day where it is rare to even get a few minutes of peace from mobile devices, computers, family, and friends, being released from these distractions can provide an opportunity, perhaps the first in a long time, for true reflection.

When was the last time you made time in your life to experience the benefits of being alone? To spend a moment in true solitude away from your mobile phone?

Money, Time, and Work can make you feel imprisoned in your current reality. Having the opportunity to enjoy activities such as meditation, yoga, exercise, creative arts or even just taking a walk in nature can deepen your self-awareness, boost creativity and can be enjoyed alone.

This seclusion from the modern world can give you a whole new perspective on how you are living your life. The almost sacred path to self-discovery in solitude can let you better hear and feel what it is you truly desire, hold important and what it is that your soul has been yearning for.

True self-love and nurturing a healthy self-relationship can enable us to have healthier relationships with others.

  •  HEALTH BENEFITS

Whether your perfect break from reality would include health & fitness, adventure, nutrition, relaxation & stress reduction, all of course yielding benefits to your health, you can guarantee a retreat is available

There are a vast array of retreats available at scenic locations spread across the globe to suit every different type of person. From the specialist ‘Prestige Boot Camp’s in Spain, ‘Macrobiotic weeks’ in Scotland, yoga or meditation retreats across South East Asia and others providing an assortment of activities and classes.

Whichever retreat you would choose to suit your interests or ambitions all are organised with the target of returning you home refreshed, feeling revitalised and reconnected to your body, mind and soul.

Offering a multitude of health benefits it is important you choose an escape that is well organised and will provide you the education, tools, and continuing support to stay the course of a healthier lifestyle once home.

  • CONNECTION WITH NATURE

4 reasons a yoga retreat will change your life

Powerful backdrops like those found in South East Asia or Costa Rica provide flawless settings for deep relaxation, healing, and transformation.

Being surrounded by nature will take you back to your alpha mind state helping you to really feel your environment and your place within it, altering your energy and vibration and creating a sense of gratitude for the smallest of things.

Perhaps a profound experience in itself escaping the hustle and bustle of everyday life stresses, walking, hiking and living in nature offer the further, perhaps now alien to us living in the modern world, opportunity to connect with nature.

Hiking through the jungle teaming with wildlife or swimming at the base of a waterfall there are retreats available globally and the natural environments to be explored are endless.

Perhaps you already feel a connection with nature, spending time at a retreat will further serve to deepen it. These experiences are unforgettable and will change the way you look and feel with nature on your return, even if you must return back to the busy city.

  • EXPERIENCE

Whether skiing or surfing as part of an ‘adventure’ retreat, practicing yoga and meditation in a more spiritual escape or fasting as part of a detox; a retreat will undoubtedly provide an opportunity for new skills and lessons to be learned and experiences to be enjoyed.  

Trying new activities or practicing those you already enjoy in a new environment, with new teachers and other participants, expose you to new experiences and mindsets that all serve to mould and shape you, no matter how significantly or insignificantly it may seem.

This experience, as a whole, will leave you feeling calmer, more connected to who you are and more present in day-to-day life. This is something you will take home after any retreat.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

bec weeden retreat

Bec Weeden – A qualified Health, Lifestyle, Integrative Nutrition Coach, and a Yoga Teacher. Having had first-hand experience of the stress and unhealthy lifestyle factors that come with working full-time, juggling a career, friends, family and social life, during a high-end corporate career in sales and marketing for over 10 years, I began studying my passions on the side and decided to take the leap and change my life. I launched IN2U Health and Wellness to focus on bringing real holistic and healthy lifestyle changes to busy people to escape the hustle and bustle of modern day life.